Saturday, June 24, 2006

What My Birth Month Means............

DECEMBER Babies

1. Loyal and generous (*i so am loyal....i have my frenz to second tat*)

2. Patriotic (*i'll fight 4 my country!!...i know it sound too cliché right..i mean won't u?!*)

3. Active in games and interactions (*Hell yeah!so much so tat it has coz me a torn ligament*)

4. Impatient and hasty (*NO WAY!!! i'm the MOST patient person on planet earth*)

5. Ambitious (*Surely.......i wanna be an Events Mgt Director or a Casino Host 4 high rollers*)

6. Influential in organisations (*tat i don't know..but i had very good testimonials from ex-
bosses*)

7. Fun to be with (*god i hope so......*)

8. Loves to socialise (*i'm a social creature*)

9. Loves praises (*u wldn't love to be praised??!!*)

10. Loves attention (*Hell nooooooo!!! infact i shy away from attention*)

11. Loves to be loved (*AMEN to tat!!!!!!*)

12. Honest and trustworthy (*oooo yesh........hell yeah!!!*)

13. Not pretending (*i second tat!!! i hate pple who are super fake..character wise tat is..*)

14. Short tempered (*i beg to differ........*)

15. Changing personality (*lets just say i know when to be crazy & when to be sane*)

16. Not egoistic (*who likes egoistical being?...i sure don't*)

17. Takes high pride in oneself (*yesh....every1 sld too*)

18. Hates restrictions (*Hallelujah to tat!!!!!!*)

19. Loves to joke (*Pple laugh with me...& laugh at me too....*)

20. Good sense of humor (*yeap...yeap*)

WoRdS oF tHe InDiAn GeiShA at 10:50 PM

Monday, June 19, 2006

In My HeAd

I've changed my blog's song.............and i've added this Fiona Apple song called "Criminal". I ain't sure if you guys still remember this artist but way back then, when i was around 12yrs old i fondly recall blasting her songs on my Hi-Fi. I just have no idea as to why this darn song has been ringing in my head all week.

WoRdS oF tHe InDiAn GeiShA at 9:44 PM

Friday, June 16, 2006

Tough Life

Just when u think everything in ya life is goin back to the way it was b4....something HAS to happen to turn ya life around a full 360 degrees. Things at home are alot better....mum and dad back to the usual WACKYness....my bro is forever the KUKU bird of the family..haha....but then....there's ME....good old' RENA.....who's life is nothing less than ORDINARY.

A few days ago.......TUESDAY 13th June tat is..........was probably one of the BEST times of my entire life. Never b4 have i been soo proud of wat i've accomplished. I've FINALLY graduated with a DIPLOMA in Business Studies. For those who are really very close to me would know how much Mental, Physical...& sometimes even Verbal Abuse/ Pain (*from my own peers*) i had to endure during the 3 years in Ngee Ann Poly. But despite ALL that and more............i pulled through the TOUGH times....and fought back. I know i'm a real fighter..........i fight for my rights....and make sure tat my dignity is never tanished by some bloody racist BITCHES!

However, no matter how much i try to make things all rosy and happy............something HORRIBLE always have to happen to me. First it started with my ACL Reconstruction surgery. I was on the verge of goin CRAZY coz i felt soooo useless and had to depend on others to do some many things for me. I've always been an independent girl and most often never trouble others or even ask people to get something done for me. So from an independant young lady to someone who constantly needed someone to help me up was a real sucky situation.

So i thought.......okie.....i'm on the road to recovery for my knee and everythings gonna be A.OKIE! But.........NO................HELL NO.........tat wasn't the case for me. If you haven't heard it by now.........let me break some really SHOCKING news to you. I just went for yet another surgery. Oh YES!!!!!!! u heard tat right. On wednesday morning, I was rushed to the Accident & Emergency ward in SGH. There was a HUGE lump in my left underarm that had to be removed immediately. My parents totally freaked out! You know wat was the worst part of the whole surgery, I was wide awake! I could feel every single incision and needle tat when through my skin. Even though they gave me a LOCAL anaesthesia, the numbness didn't last for long. Even my surgeon was puzzled. That shows how fast my body system shut down and how resistant it is against the medication. It's also coz it's like my freaking THRID time goin under the knife!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG!!!!!!!! it was such a traumatizing situation tat i was in. I was like screaming at the top of my lungs, begging the surgeon to stop. My mum said tat she could heard me cryin in pain. That was how loud i was screaming. I tell u..........compared to my serious ACL surgery, this one was HELLA painful. It was excruciating!!!!!!!!!!!! And oh!!!! after the whole surgery, the freaking surgeon and the nurses just left all the wire gauze and cloth tat was soaked in blood right in front of me. Worst still, even the various sizes of scalpel used where also left lying around and even the floor had blood all over the place. Can you imagine wat i would have felt right at the moment when i saw it ALL??!!!!!! It's really traumatizing..........Moreover, i kindda have photographic memory of certain things & now everytime i close my eyes.......all those horrifying images just comes rushing back!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyday is real torture for me. I need to go the polyclinic to get my dressing done. And the is, there's abt 7cm long of wire gauze tat has been inserted right in the place when the incision is done. Apparently the doc told my parents tat there's a hollow area in my left underarm due to the removal of the huge lump. It's abt 0.5cm wide and 1.2cm deep. CRAZY right??!!!!!!!! and all the hollow area needs to be covered with a gauze. And everytime the dressing is done, they need to pull it out....and stuff it in with a fresh piece gauze. I almost fainted yesterday when the nurse took out & showed me the wire gauze soaked with blood. Never have been in soooooo much of pain. Let me paint you a picture as to how much pain i am in 24/7. It feels like someone had just poured alcohol on an open wound. That excatly how i feel.

I really don't know why all these terrible things keep happening to me. I'm just sooooooooo lost and alone right now. What the hell did i do to deserve such horrible pain??!!!!!

WoRdS oF tHe InDiAn GeiShA at 3:12 PM

Saturday, June 03, 2006

One Week post............

You know its quite sad for someone of my age to forget things so darn fast. I wanted to blog abt a couple of important...& now all of a sudden...POOF!!!!! i forgot wat i wanted to post abt.....Ahh!!! i'm just gonna do wat i do best..."Word Vomit"....LOL.........i'll just type wat i can remember....

Monday (29th May '06)

Erm......I always HATE mondays..........and NO!! it's not cause of Monday Blues.... I just feel like i've got a whole lot to go through again for the entire week........Now tat's one mindset tat i'm tryin to change.........Stay Positive Rena!!!!!!!! Anyway....i can't recall wat the heck i did on Monday.

Tuesday (30th May '06)

Most of my tuesdays are spent in SGH......it's like the first place i go to every Tuesday morning. This tuesday was one tat wasn't a very pleasant one to start with. I was undergoin my physio therapy session when the unthinkable happened again!!!!!! My knee got jammed while doin the leg press with 20kg weights. WAHH!! i tell u the pain i had to endure.....was overwhelming!!! Thank God for Elaine...my absolutely amazing therapist. She told me to step it up to 12 pounds on my leg lifts to strengthen my thigh muscles. She was sayin tat i might have the locking of knees problem due to the lack of muscles in certain place in my leg.

However, towards the end of the therapy session, my knees kept getting "locked" so often tat i really couldn't tahan anymore. Elaine than broke the horrifying possibility as to why i cld be experiencing all of those. You see there's like a lump of jelly looking muscle called meniscus tat is cushioning our knee joints. She assumes tat my "locking" & "jamming" of my knees even after the surgery being done cld be due to a tear in the meniscus . She told me tat the place where the ligament had been repaired and area tat cld be causing problem now are TWO very different areas. And then came the worst part of her whole explaination. I might need to go under the knife AGAIN to "clean up" that meniscus through a SCOPE. I tell u........the minute she said tat....i felt like someone had just hit me with a Hockey stick!!!!!!! My head was spinning. Elaine knew how i felt...coz my disappointment was practically written wide across my forehead.

I broke the sad news to my dad, who is always there with me for all my therapy sessions. Tellin him tat i might need another surgery really made him very upset. But being the Goofy father he is....he did his very best to crack jokes and try to divert the topic onto something more happy. Thanks dad!!!!!!!

That was the crappy first half of the day. However later in the evening.........it was a night out with the girls...& their boyfriends too at Clake Quay.........Met up wif Deb, Haddad, Sze Yee, Gerald and then Cheryl and Eddie jointed us much later in the evening. We initially went to some Italian restaurant to eat some....DUH!!! pizza....... and since it was Fine Dining, we all had such a freaking hard time trying to cut the pizza. Wahh........deb and i were super tempted to use our hands....but of course in the end we didn't..........for obvious reasons... haha

Then we headed down to CAFE IGUANA.........damn i LOVE the Margaritas there!!!!!!! We order two jugs of Mango and ........ damn i forgot the other one...was it Pink Guava? Ahh i don't know....but watever i was........it was YUMMY!!!!!!!!! We all drank and chatted to our hearts content........Deb..........that kuku bird got high a lil faster tat i thought.......and u know......she started to talk in unfinished sentences.........Haddad and i were laughing soo hard........i think i laughed more............coz its soo funnie to watch Deb when she's drunk......she laughs SUPER loud man!!!!!!! And most of the time she laughed into my ears....or rather in the direction tat i was seated at..........Ahiyoooo Debbie...Debbie............. All in all..........the day ended off PERFECT!!!!!! I LOVE U GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday (31st May '06)

Dad had a day off today......and mum took 1/2 day off to spent time with me. The 3 of us headed down to the new Cathay to watch THE DA VINCI CODE. I didn't really enjoy the movie much at all.............at least mum and dad did.............they were talkin abt it the whole day... I felt the movie was too indulging....... the novel was ALOT better........... after watching the movie........we went for a lil shopping.......we were searching high and low of a nice long sleeves blouse of my Graduation Ceremony..... but in the end.....i cldn't find any.........

Can't recall wat i did next...........but one things for such............i sure as HELL didn't sleep tat night.........i didn't sleep till 5.30am the following morning..........I know i slept ard tat time coz i heard my dad's alarm clock ringing............ And.....tat was also the night the bore the bad news tat one of my Grandmother, my mum's aunt, passed away. Talk abt one bad news after another. Seems like this year i'm losing a couple of my relatives.......... I don't even want this year to end....coz i'm soo fearful as to whom i may lose next...............

Thursday (1st June '06)

Went out with mum and dad again later in the day. Headed down to Raffles City Shopping Centre. Once again we were tryin to find a nice blouse for my Graduation. I didn't want to buy a dark coloured blouse coz my blazer tat i bought is in Black.........So we went round and round. We went to Tommy Hilfiger, Ralf Laurent, Espirit.......... U name it.......we went there........until finally........my dad spotted a elegant top in S.OLIVER..... a German boutique store. It was the one blouse tat looked damn stylish and yet formal. But once i saw the price tag......gosh i was flabbergasted............it was very pricey.....and i told my parents to forget abt it......... but my mum insisted tat i try to at least if it fits well with the blazer & guess wat............i LOOKed GOOD!!!!!!! U can say i looked HOT.........in a elegant way........haha............ Even my dad thought it was really beautiful. So he bought it for me.........without any hesitation. I felt sooo bad......coz it was really expensive...........but he said its a treat for me.............. Damn........... in the words of my buddy Cheryl.........i'm one LUCKY BITCH............LOL..........THANKS DAD & MUM!!!!!!

Friday (2nd June '06)

Sit and Rot at home day.................tat's wat it all was...............And oh............i didn't sleep well either..........i just stared at the 4 walls of my crib..........

Today (3rd June '06)

Gonna go out with mum and dad later.............going to shop for a nice saree for Mum................ Can't wait...............Ciao pple....it's been a really long post............so better end it here.......

WoRdS oF tHe InDiAn GeiShA at 1:46 PM